Skip to main content

holding out

The other day we got an unexpected check in the mail.
A fat one.
Not super fat, like go on a cruise kind of fat. But nice.
One that will keep us from biting our nails at the end of the month and let me pay off some medical bills and bought my baby girl a ridiculously cute Easter dress.

Thank you Bartlett Shale and Chesepeake Oil company.

But I still hesitated to cash it because I was wondering if we held out if we would get more. The check was for an extension on our mineral rights because they are drilling for gas in the vicinity.
When it was time for the original lease, a man knocked on our door and offered us a check for 800$.
I was thrilled. I didn’t immediately sign on the dotted line. I did a little research. I called my dad all to make sure that this was legit. Eventually we signed and cashed our check. I thought we were being responsible. And if you live in our area you know that most people got A LOT more than we did.

What we didn’t do, that our neighbors did.
Was haggle.
We didn’t try and deal and we didn’t ask for more.
Because neither me nor my husband are really good at that.
I mean I do take pride in a bargain, but I don’t like the haggling part.
And my husband….well he’d pay full price in Mexico if you let him.
So when we found out that our neighbors got so much more,
Suddenly I felt cheated.
Suddenly a surprise 800$ didn’t seem like enough and left a bitter taste in my mouth.
Because someone else got more.
And greed doesn’t taste very good.
I let what I didn’t have take the joy out of what I did.
Because when it comes down to it,
And the end of the day I was still given a pretty nice ridiculously unexpected gift.

So again I called my dad. Shaun got out the original lease and we asked around.
And eventually we cashed the check.
And celebrated our unexpected blessing.
Regardless of what our neighbors get.
Holding out for more might just rob me of what I have right now.
And that isn’t worth it.

Comments

Esther said…
I love your writing. I can tell already that yours is going to be one of my favorite blogs!!

Popular posts from this blog

Either/Or

Recently I met an old friend for lunch. He was actually my senior high prom date. He wasn’t just my prom date, but had been my friend for a good part of high school. And our group has mostly stayed in touch through the years. But not him. Even though we live in the same big metroplex, I hadn’t seen him in almost 15 years. At prom, He even won some kind of senior superlative, Mr. BHS or something like that. In other words, he was well-liked, nice, funny and smart. And it helped that he drove a Camero. We didn’t break up or have a falling out. He kind of just disappeared. And not just from me, but from everyone. And I had looked for him. At class reunions. On myspace. And eventually, only about a year ago, he finally showed up on facebook. When he did, I suggested we get together for dinner or something. And he responded with a really awkward email. Explaining that he was gay. Warning me. Trying to let me out of my dinner invitation if I wanted. And I already knew this. Possibly I had ev

me too

I used to never question God. It was just part of the way things were. Just like I believed in Santa and the tooth fairy and the Easter bunny. And eventually I grew up and started to wonder. I always believed, But occasionally I started to wonder if he was always good. If he really loved me. Singular me rather than an all inclusive version. That he was paying attention. That my prayers mattered.` And I didn’t know that I should play by the rules. That questioning these outloud things in a Bible study or Sunday School class Will get you bumped to the top of the prayer list. Because I know. But sometimes I wonder. And I didn’t need their scripture memory verses or their books or their prayers. (but I guess prayers never hurt) And I was just hoping for someone else to say “me too”. And, Jason Boyett’s book, O Me of Little Faith Is one great big “me too” And like most books I like he asks a whole lot more questions than he answers. Hard ones. Ones without real answers. Ones that make me wa

imaginary friends

Recently I had a friend disappoint me. I didn’t tell them. And I didn’t write about it when it happened. Instead I seethed a little and got angrier and slightly resentful and finally dumped it on my husband. (who had some great advice that will come later) And. I have hesitated to write this piece because a lot of my real life friends read this. Maybe even the one I’m writing about. Maybe not. Actually I’m not really sure. And to be honest the best pace to work this out would be with them. Just them. And not on line. But. It’s not really about them. It’s more about me. And I don’t think there is so much to work out anyways. So, if you are my real life friend and are reading this and wondering, hesitantly or fearfully if this is about you. It might be. But it probably isn’t. And again. Even if it is. It’s not REALLY about you. And if it isn’t. It could be. If we have been friends for more than five minutes, we have probably had a moment like this. So, back to me venting to my husband.