The difficult kind

On Monday Tess had a doctor's appointment. The regularly-scheduled-healthy-4 shots kind. I couldn't wait. I had a list of questions. I am not normally the kind of mom that prepares a list of questions for each doctor's visit. At least I didn't with Owen. I am no rookie. Baby #2 is supposed to be a breeze. But so far nothing has been easy or what I expected.
Don't get me wrong. I have been blessed with a beautiful and healthy little girl ( unless you count the 3+ colds we have had so far).
But she has been tough.
In addition to her days and nights being backwards... she had some major aversion to her daddy. He would come home and pick her up and she would just scream. It was funny for a bit, but after a few weeks of it Shaun started to get his feelings hurt......and mommy was desperate for a break. She came around eventually.
She also decided to start rejecting the bottle THE exact week I went back to work ( and yes, she has had at least one bottle every day since the hospital). After buying every nipple they had at Babies R Us...we finally found one that she will tolerate....and no of course it does NOT work with all the expensive bottles we had for Owen.
Ok, I know you aren't supposed to compare kids...but..........
Owen was pretty laid back. Tess is super high strung. You can not lay her down for more than a few minutes ( if even that). She must be held and she must be moving. This means I spend most of the my time at home with her attached. Meaning I sport one of those really goofy lookin baby Bjorns.
Sleep...or my lack there of could fill multiple blog posts. I was totally spoiled before. Owen slept through the night at 8 or 9 weeks and pretty much stayed that way.
2 months came and went. Still waking up multiple times a night.
3 months.....still waking up.
4 months....last night she had me up 4X ( twice to eat!)
I am exhausted. My clothes are covered in spit up. I search the internet for topics like colic and reflux. Going out to eat usually doesn't end well. And I would love for an evening without screaming. This is going to be my difficult child. Stubborn impatient from day 1.

BUT she is easy to love.
The ability to love her comes just as easy and naturally as it did for my laid back "easy" firstborn.
Loving my children doesn't stem from what they do or don't do....or even how much sleep I am getting.

This is a relief to me. Because I think I might also be "the difficult kind".
To God. I am lazy and stubborn and screw up again and again. My hope is that I can be just as easy to love anyways.

Tess 4 month stats




12 lbs 13 oz
25.25 inches
new trick -- putting my feet in my mouth
still cranky and not a fan of sleeping through the night

in honor of the ice storm

if you are stuck at home like me.........
turn up the volume and DANCE

cabin fever

ice storm + hyper 3 year old boy makes for a bad combination.
solution: challenge him to try and lick his elbow
and when all else fails find a big cardboard box.

Parting the Waters ...part II

Read this book!
BUT
1) don't start it at night........you will stay up late to finish it (and I have the bags under my eyes to prove it)
2) have plenty of tissue on hand.

Parting the Waters ...part I

A few weeks ago I was talking to a good friend who runs blog tours about a student in my school.
Almost exactly a year ago, there was a bad car wreck at lunch at the school that I teach. Bad. One student died, several others were injured. One has severe brain damage and has just now returned to school. Not to the regular classes that she took before, but downstairs in the Special Ed section of the building. Now she is learning on about a 1st grade level and needs help doing almost everything.
I wonder who has had the rougher journey. The parent who lost a thriving 16 year old, or the one has got to keep hers but in a totally different mental capacity.
I was telling my friend that maybe the latter would be the hardest.
She wasn't so sure.
She knew a different story......another friend who had actually been in a similar situation and had an amazing tale to tell.

Fast forward a few weeks and Parting the Waters by Jeanne Damoff arrived in the mail.
Overwhelmed with babies, work and colds......means I haven't gotten very far into the book just yet. I'll update this review after I have finished. Until then check it out for yourself:


Parting the Waters on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1579219500

The Baby Fat Blog Tour



When my friend Tina email me a few months ago to see if I wanted to participate in the Baby Fat Diet blog tour, Tess was about 6 weeks old. My wardrobe still mostly consisted of stretchy pants. I shot back a sassy reply......something along the lines of "what? are you calling me fat?" .....and eagerly awaited for the book to arrive in the mail.
The book finally arrived, and not a minute too late. Heading back to work after Tess, meant I need to wear "real" clothes on a regular basis. Problem is most of my "real" clothes don't zip up all the way. Well at least not with me in them.
I immediately dug into my new book, written by 2 moms and dieticians Monica Bearden and Shana Aaron.
I liked the format. It was written in short chapters that can be read in any order. Perfect for a mom's crazy schedule. It does a lot to try and give you tips that are "doable" with little time and energy. To be honest most of it was stuff I have heard before......but it was all good to hear again. I went to the store and stocked up on plenty of healthy options and am already down a few pounds. I have a long way to go to lose my baby weight........but now I am armed with lots of new tips, menu ideas and motivation.
Now if only they suggested a food that would make Tess sleep through the night...

Some links to check out:
The Baby Fat Diet on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1592577970

The Baby Fat Diet Website: http://babyfatdiet.com/

The Baby Fat Diet Blog: http://babyfatdiet.com/blog

List of Participating Bloggers:

5 Minutes for Books
A Little Whine and Cheese
A Peek at My Bookshelf
Be Your Best Mom
Behind the Mountain
Blog Tour Spot
Bookish Mom Reviews
Camy’s Loft
Fictionary
Fit Family
i don’t believe in grammar
In God’s Image
In the Dailies
Kells Creative Musings
Lighthouse Academy
Mommy Snacks.Net
Mommy’s Must Haves
Momopoly
Quiverfullfamily.com
Real Women Scrap
Refresh My Soul
Roni’s Weigh
The Journey of Writer Danica Favorite
The Law, Books and Life
The Pitter Patter of Losing Pounds
The Sassy Pear
The Unadorned Book Review
wandering, wonderings of a whacked-out woman

moved by the spirit of Spiderman

During church on Sunday, Owen kept raising up one hand.
The people around us might have thought he was really into the worship songs.
(for the most part, people don't raise hands in our church service)
If they looked closely, they would have realized that my son was web-slinging Spiderman style...NOT lifting up his hands in praise.

two in a row

Tess has slept through the night twice in a row.
Next step, mom needs to sleep through the night.
To not wake up and 2 am and wonder why my baby hasn't.
To not get up and make sure she is still in fact breathing.

Our Sunday bests

I have never been very good at pretending.
Well, ok at pretending to be a pirate or a monster or spiderman, or whatever role my 3 year old assigns me.
I mean the pretending that the rest of us seem to have down to an art.
The kind where everything is fine. The kind where I at least appear to have it all together. I generally like this about me. I think it makes me authentic or something.
Sunday mornings, however, are a different story.
I'd give anything for the four of us to make it to church on time and sit quietly in our pew during church. I would love, for just those few hours to at least "look" like I have it together.

Most Sundays......well most mornings involve me trying to figure out what to wear.
that still fits and doesn't make me look fat (well, at least not fatter) and requires minimal ironing. I don't have too many options here. This mornings choice was a shirt with a stain on the back and that desperately needed to be ironed ( didn't get that) and a skirt that was on the too small side ( and could use an iron, although not quite as badly as the shirt).

I fed Tess and laid out some clothes for her ( hers of course were cute and managed to match). I started the long and involved process of waking up Owen, laid out his clothes, stressed to Shaun that we needed to move it we were going to make it on time and hopped in the shower. I reluctantly admitted that there was not time enough to dry my hair. This could be ok becuase slightly dirty hair always straightens better anyways.
A quick shower and I got up and dressed Tess, and tried to kick Owen into gear. Of course the clothes I picked out were not to his liking. Argued over wether or not his pjs were appropriate for church. We ended in a compromise. No pjs, but also not the cute shirt I picked out either.
Back to me, but only long enough to put in my contacts. A glance at the watch and I realized that not only would I have to put on make up in the car, but that I would have to do my hair there as well. The flat iron would have to wait, but I did find 2 cute clips that would suffice. I hoped that pulling it up in them would transform my slept on look into pretty pulled up waves.
I managed to find socks and shoes for Owen and Tess ( well just socks for her)......but my brown shoes were missing from their usual hiding places ( under the couch, by the front door or even occasionally in the kitchen). I slipped on some worn out black flats instead even though they obviously clashed with my khaki skirt.
Owen is asking for a snack and we are already late. I put some cereal in a baggy along with the snack he didn't finish last night and fill up his cup with some juice. He is not happy. I promise him a donut hole after church if he is good. And then siliently pray, "please God, don't let them run out of donut holes this week before we get one". Breakfast for me, I just hope someone remembers snacks this week at Sunday school or I might eat my styrofoam coffee cup.
I load everyone up in the car and am thrilled to see my brown shoes on the floorboard. We get out of the driveway...in time to only be 10 minutes late...and as much as I hate to do it I ask Shaun to stop. I grab his keys and go back and get a bottle for Tess. She has to eat too I suppose.
So back on our way, and time to get started on my hair and makeup.
makeup, well I missed that class in junior high but made do with my minimal skills and even put on eye liner ( usually reserved for very special occasions.)
My hair is worse than I remembered and search frantically for the clippies that are going to transform me into something presentable.
One of them is missing.
I try so hard not to cuss so that I don't hear "mommy said a bad word" harping at me from the backseat.
I suddenly just want to go home and crawl back in bed.
All the packing, running, sock hunting suddenly seem pointless if I have to walk in with bed hair.
I'm afraid Shaun will leave me on the side of the road if I even hint at this so I ride silently the rest of the way to church picturing everyone else in there ironed clothes and perfect hair.

We get to church, and slip into our side pew ( for easy escape w/ owen or Tess). It is hard to really pay attention...trying to keep Owen from coloring on the seat and Tess from screaming but I like the four of us sitting together. I normally don't care to let everyone know about my messy life, but just once I'd like to fit into a size 6, not to look like one big wrinkle, or to have freshly coifed hair like all the "mommies" in the pews next to me. I wallow in this a bit until I look down and realize that you could braid the hairs on my knees.....and that maybe the hair on my head is the least of my worries this morning. Also the spit up on my blouse will nicely camoflauges all the wrinkles.

no use crying over spilled milk

unless of course it is breast milk.
then crying is completely justified.
cussing is also ok.

day job

you know that saying......don't quit your day job.
well the day job is occasionally tough, but my night job is killing me.
all the stuff I should be asleep...duties are as follows:
clothes for the next day layer-outer
bottle maker
story reader
milk producer
lock double checker
head propper upper for coughers
snore alerter (as in please roll over you are snoring)
glass of water-getter
monster-slayer
humidifier re-filler
baby feeder
dog letter in ( and out and back in again)
medicine administrator
nightmare soother
pacifier locator and re-inserter
please please go back to sleep begger
snooze hitter
snooze hitter again

not a good sign.......

.....when your waitress leaves you the phone number for a babysitter.

wish i'd written this...

a rough start

Apparently 09 is not off to the best of starts.
Shaun thinks bad things come in 3s around our house. On Friday, I reported that I had lost my wallet. While Shaun opened the car door to help me look for it, the window fell out. So for him that was 2. He was waiting for #3 to hit. I told him it already had. Choose, the fact Owen has had a fever for a week straight ( often peaking high enough to warrant a cold bath), or the Tech cotton bowl loss ( it is a good thing my husband spend 100$ on a ticket and left me home alone ALL day with not one but 2 sick kids to witness that one), or the fact that when we took the car to get it fixed our warranty ran out exactly one month ago, or that we had to cancel our sushi plans with friends b/c O had yet another fever.
Apparently Shaun was right. 3s it is and all those other things I listed don't count.
Currently Shaun and O are at the hospital waiting amidst a sea of sick people for some nice doctor to stitch up my baby's chin. Owen fell in the tub while playing pirates and sharks ( not sure what the rules are exactly...but I am thinking that the pirates and sharks won).
Why am I blogging and not holding his hand you might ask...well I am out home w/ Tess and refuse to let her near any of that germy hospital air. If he didn't have RSV or the flu before I am sure he will come home with it. (I did go for triage, paperwork and to apply pressure on the car ride there though before you take away my mom card).
The debit card is canceled. The car window is fixed. Hopefully my son is being stitched up as I type. The trifecta is complete........meaning I expect only good things for the rest of the year ( ok, I'll settle for just making it through the week without having to stay home with a sick child.)

2008 in pictures

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