Skip to main content

round after round



A few weeks ago, I had coffee with an old friend.
Actually she is an old student.
One of my firsts and my favorites.
And now she is all grown up and about to take off to join the Peace Corps.
(and I am super jealous)
So we caught up over some joe, while we were both in town.

And our quick cup of coffee turned into over a few hours.
We talked about travel and family and books.
And faith, and doubt.
And she is at that age and stage where it is all exciting.
It is all a book waiting to be written.
Where you can’t help but see God’s hand everywhere you look.

And she has been growing and reading and asking a lot of good questions.
Some of the questions I have been asking myself.
And at least three times she led into conversations with,
“how do you resolve….”
grace, but the gospel’s obvious calls to action.
passion for justice, while friends and family sometimes seem to be more passionate about the new TV lineup, or shopping or whatever.
Trusting and waiting, with going and doing.

And the teacher in me wanted to have answers for her.
And for me.
I wanted to give her the solutions.
Or the wisdom that I have gleaned in the last dozen or so years.
How I resolve those things and a handful of others.

But each time.
I just said,
I haven’t resolved much of anything.
Instead, I wrestle.
And I continue to wrestle.
And that maybe that is the answer.
Being willing to wrestle.
And evaluate, and read and pray and listen.
Wash and repeat.

Because anybody can make up an answer.
And a whole lot of people can even back it up.
But not as many people are willing to wrestle.
And the thing about wrestling, is that it is active.
And occasionally exhausting.

But eventually, we both eventually got up from the table.
And went our separate ways.
Her to Peru. Me back to the suburbs.
Ready to go round after round.

Comments

Melissa said…
Just recently I've stopped pretending that I have answers, and I've been surprised by how many family members have been very uncomfortable with that.

Popular posts from this blog

multiple choice

As I write I am procturing a test ( yes on a Saturday, and no I am not getting paid for it.) The room is silent. The only noises I hear are pencils scratching on papers and pages turning. If I listen closely enough I swear I can hear their brains turning. I have always been a good test-taker. I would still regularly brag about my SAT scores if it wre socially appropriate to do so(or an actual indicator of anything meaningful). There is something comforting about multiple choice. (well as long as you don't have the crappy all of the above or none of the above choices...just the classic A, B, C, D variety). There are parameters. Multiple choice means you have options. The right answer is right in front of you, and all you have to do is find it. Even if you don't actually know which one the right answer is there are usually clues, it can be narrowed down or worked backwards. Even a blind guess is likely to be right 25% of the time. These aren't bad odds. All you have t...

Turning the question

My school has been sending me to some inquiry training. The “i” word has been thrown around since my education classes in college. It is one of those things that is really good as a concept but kind of hard to pull off in the classroom well. For lots of reasons. But the big one number is because teachers are reluctant to let go of the control. To let the kids loose with a concept and see where they end up. Let them discover, own it and share out all on their own. Without intervening. Then push them a little bit further and clear up any misconceptions that they are holding onto before they slip out your door. This is supposed to be the most meaningful way for a kid to learn. For them to discover rather than memorize. One of the other problems with inquiry and science is that kids have stopped learning how to ask questions. My son bombards me with whys all day long. Why are owls nocturnal? (which comes out a lot more like “not-turtles”) Why do I have to take a shower? Why ...

pursue something else.

Americans like the idea of happy. of pursuing happiness. It is even one of our inalienable rights at least according to the Declaration of Independance. But I think maybe we should pursue something else. like love or joy or peace or contentment. and leave happy alone. Don't read me wrong. I am neither bitter nor cynical. Even my problems are good problems. I am positive. Half full. And most days I laugh a whole lot more than I cry. And simple things like a dance party in the living room, an hour alone in Barnes and Noble, the yellow pajama pants my son picked out for me for mother's day, potstickers, clean sheets, someone surprising me with coffee, jeans fresh from the dryer, a good song on the radio, or squeals of delight when I walk in the door all make my heart sing. They make me happy. For a minute. But when the squealing turns to screaming, my new pants are dirty, the sheets are in a jumble on the floor or the coffee runs out....where does that leave me? And happy isn'...