safe

This afternoon I was frantically trying to open a belated Christmas present for O from a friend. I spent a good 15 minutes untwisting an ungodly amount of twisty ties. You know the kind you can’t cut through as well as finding a screwdriver to unscrew the hardware holding it in place. O cried for the toy impatiently. The added stress made me untwist the ties in the opposite direction and make an even bigger mess. The floor was strewn with spare parts, all probably choking hazards before finally the roaring dinosaur was free and ready to be played with. By then, O had settled on the wine bottle opener ( totally a safe toy right?) that had a remarkable resemblance to a robot.
Maybe we occasionally do this with our joy. We hide it away so that no one can steal it. We twist it and tie and keep it safe.
Safe.
I hate that word.
Last night I prayed that Shaun would get back from St. Louis safely. That O would be safe at school ( besides that kid who bit him……..when I find out what 2 year old is responsible I am going to steal their blankie!). But we aren’t promised safe. We really don’t want it. Sure we want test results to come back negative. We want to make it from one place to another all in one piece. We want our knees to remain unscathed.
Then again sometimes scars can be really cool. Later, after they heal.
When we are safe……we are tied down and held back just like that toy that O has yet to play with. Joy is meant to be shared……..even if that means someone steals ours from time to time.

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