Guns, Boobs, and Racist Comments

...all from my kids.

My son was talking about someone named Maddy. We have a good friend named Maddy, but we haven’t seen her lately and I know that it is a common name so I was trying to decipher who exactly he was talking about. Our conversation went as follows:
Me:“Owen, is there a Maddy in your classs?”
O:” Yes, but that one is a different color than us.”
Me. (trying not to freak out or make it too big a deal, but slightly concerned and wondering where this conversation was going to go…because I have never heard him mention race or color before)…”hmmm, what does that mean Owen? What color are you?”
O: “Mom!!! (like I am asking the most dumb and obvious question ever). “I’m blonde”

In the car on the way home from dinner, Owen and Tess were entertaining themselves in the backseat. Mostly by Owen pretending that his hand was a gun and was shooting his sister with his fingers. Tess, might be the girliest girl I know….but she can wrestle and play legos and hang with all the boys on our street…took no time at all to get out her “handgun” and start shooting back. With full sound effects. After firing off just a few rounds, She looked at her hand, then at me and says, “Mine’s not working!”

We pulled into the parking lot of a local Mexican restaurant that happens to be one building over from a Hooters. I go to help Owen out of the car and his face is all lit up and he excitedly exclaims,
“Mom! We’re going to Hooters!”
Uhm. No. And we never will.

(and keeping w/ the kid inappropriate theme...two more things they should avoid, but makes for a pretty great song.)