The Friday Playlist posing as a book review (but I promise there is a playlist!)

My friend Tina runs blog tours (and takes amazing photos, makes mac and cheese from scratch and brews my favorite cup of coffee in the metroplex).
I like to read and I have a blog. I also really like free books.
So it is a match made in heaven. (A very caffienated heaven).

Except for the fact that book reviews, or the grown up version of a book reports, always kind of stress me out.
I think you are supposed to talk about what the book is about and the author, but really the back cover usually does a pretty good job of that.
You are supposed to give your own “critique” of the book. But I think this girl with a blog who doesn’t know when to properly use a comma shouldn’t really make reccomendations or complaints to someone who has actually published a book and actually uses spell check.

I also think most book reviews sound a little too comercially.
So instead, I usually just try to write something somehow related to the book and then plug it at the end, because I did get a free copy after all (thank you Zondervan).

So as I read this book ( Evolving in Monkey Town by Rachel Held Evans) I formulated my blog post in my head. I had a catchy title and a good intro and the overall main idea. I wasn’t really sure where I was going after that…..but I’m sure it would wrap up cleverly.

And then I got to the last chapter of Rachel’s book (and no, we aren't really on first name terms but after reading her book and blog I kind of feel like we should be).
And it was essentially my blog post.
She had beat me to it and said it better.

But since I don’t feel like writing a book report or doing a canned interview. You’ll have to read my version anyways.
However, I’d like to suggest you read hers. After reading the first 20 chapters of course. Because like I said, (and it is worth repeating), she says it better.

Three Little Words ( that was going to be my catchy title).

I’m sure it’s just not me, but a lot of people have a hard time saying those three words too. It ranks right up there with I'm sorry.
I’m not sure if I am afraid of being vulnerable or what people think of me but I usually struggle to get those words out.
Sometimes I even make things up, usually on accident, so I don’t have to say them.
Sometimes when a student or friend asks me a question, I’ll catch myself making up an answer. Or plausible answer. What I think maybe the answer could be.
Because really the truth is.
I don’t know.
Yep those three little words.

And I’ve gotten better about giving friends wrong directions and students misinformation and just telling them the truth.
That I don’t know and will have to look it up.
Thank God for google.

But when it comes to my heart and my faith.
We are supposed to know what we believe.
With certainty. And why we believe it. And why I do certain things and don’t do others. Why we are more right than you. Why my cause is more important and my candidate is better.
And sometimes I do.
I know a few things with certainty.
The important things.
But that list is shrinking.
Quickly.
And it has left me feeling a bit unraveled.
A little bit naked.
And a lot confused.
And the answers to those kinds of questions are never as straight forward as an engine search.

Please don’t go adding me to your prayer list or scheduling me an appointment with your therapist.
I’m alright. Mostly.
I’m just having to say “I don’t know” a lot.
And am slowly learning to be a little more comfortable with that.
Because those few things I know with certainty are big enough for questions and evaluations and don’t always need clear cut answers.
Love is apparently even bigger than google.

(So a little more on the book, in case you want to read it. Which I highly suggest, although I think it should come with a warning label. Because I ended up with a lot more questions and headaches that I had when I started the book. And it must be said that it really isn’t about evolution and monkeys at all, although as a science teacher that might be a book I’d read anyways. Instead it is more about the undoing of author’s fundamentalism. Her own unraveling and the overall evolution of her faith. A faith that grows and changes and adapts in order to survive.

I’m willing to give up my copy. But it comes with a price. If you get my copy you have to be willing to have a conversation about it. Via email or over coffee. Because I have a few questions …….

And one of the best things about this book….it comes with it’s own playlist (with artists I love!). So instead of me writing my own Friday playlist, just go check out hers here.

And some other websites that I should tell you about or my friend Tina will get mad at me.
Rachel's website and blog. Which I have actually been reading since I read this post back in January.
And where you can buy the book on Amazon.
And if you are so inclined... her facebook, twitter and the rest of the other bloggers on this tour.

And really, go check out that playlist...