Skip to main content

a cool drink of water

I hand him his ice cold drink and smile and look him in the eye.
Even though I don’t even know his name.
He tells me that I’m doing a good thing.

He has seen me down here most days this week.
Dragging my blue cooler along behind me full of water and juice and sodas.
Handing them out freely to the men and women melting into the sidewalks down on East Lancaster Street.
Some are napping. Some are talking in groups. Some are smoking and some are doing things I don’t even want to know about.
It usually only takes me minutes to empty my cooler.

I’m not really sure how to respond to my new friend.
Because I want to do something good I suppose.
I want to at least do something.
Even though 95% of the time I am content sitting on the couch.
Reading.
Blogging.
Checking facebook.

So I just kind of stand there staring into his face for a minute.
And he repeats it.
“You are doing a good thing here. You are a good person.”
And I tell him, “No, I’m really not.”
No one really is.
As a matter of fact I’m hung over.
I’m tired.
I’m often unkind and ungracious.
I started my day having to make apologies for the night before.
I’m wrestling with some of my judgments and motivations.
I have had the entire week off without my kids (that I miss terribly) and haven’t even managed to unpack from my trip.
So I repeat that last part.
“No, I’m not good. I just managed to get off the couch.”
And he laughed and said he had a hard time doing that himself.
Even though his couch was just a concrete slab with the teensiest bit of shade.
And he leaned back far and sipped his cool drink.
Let out a good sigh and wiped his brow.
And assured me that “God would bless me.”
And I said I hope so.
And that I think he just did.



(This post is part of a project going on over at bigger picture blogs....and this week hosted by one of my favorite bloggers corrine.)
Bigger Picture Moment

Comments

Oh Michelle...
You did good, lady :)
The hardest part is getting off the couch. Seriously.
Thank you SO much for linking up. Don't stress about unpacked suitcases :)
becca said…
I loved this post. thank you for sharing these words which may have not been so easy to write. And although this is the first post of yours that I've read, I can tell you ARE a good person. An honest person. One who wants to do good and DOES. And that's more than many people can say.
Brooke said…
Very honest and true for alot of people...some of your words ring true for me too, especially the couch part...sometimes it takes alot to get out there and do something. I Agree with becca, you are a good person and honest at that!
Traci said…
Love your honesty here. Really wonderful post. Thanks for sharing the good and the bad.
Hyacynth said…
Goosebumps at the last line. I think He did, too.
I agree with Corinne; the hardest part IS getting off the couch.
Glad to meet you through bigger picture blogs. :)
Wow, this was startling and wonderful. I have no doubt that you ARE doing good, and that you don't ever have to be a saint to make a BIG difference.

I'm glad you linked up, and glad you got off the couch :)

Popular posts from this blog

multiple choice

As I write I am procturing a test ( yes on a Saturday, and no I am not getting paid for it.) The room is silent. The only noises I hear are pencils scratching on papers and pages turning. If I listen closely enough I swear I can hear their brains turning. I have always been a good test-taker. I would still regularly brag about my SAT scores if it wre socially appropriate to do so(or an actual indicator of anything meaningful). There is something comforting about multiple choice. (well as long as you don't have the crappy all of the above or none of the above choices...just the classic A, B, C, D variety). There are parameters. Multiple choice means you have options. The right answer is right in front of you, and all you have to do is find it. Even if you don't actually know which one the right answer is there are usually clues, it can be narrowed down or worked backwards. Even a blind guess is likely to be right 25% of the time. These aren't bad odds. All you have t...

Turning the question

My school has been sending me to some inquiry training. The “i” word has been thrown around since my education classes in college. It is one of those things that is really good as a concept but kind of hard to pull off in the classroom well. For lots of reasons. But the big one number is because teachers are reluctant to let go of the control. To let the kids loose with a concept and see where they end up. Let them discover, own it and share out all on their own. Without intervening. Then push them a little bit further and clear up any misconceptions that they are holding onto before they slip out your door. This is supposed to be the most meaningful way for a kid to learn. For them to discover rather than memorize. One of the other problems with inquiry and science is that kids have stopped learning how to ask questions. My son bombards me with whys all day long. Why are owls nocturnal? (which comes out a lot more like “not-turtles”) Why do I have to take a shower? Why ...

Meet the teacher

People keep asking me how I am or if I am going to cry. And few weeks ago, I kept saying no. I mean, I am used to dropping Owen off everyday at school. Or I’m at least used to Shaun dropping him off. I am used to school. I do it everyday. But. The first day is Monday. His and mine. And I am not ready. And I don’t just mean that my syllabus isn’t copied and that there are boxes all over my room. That would be true. But I am having doubts about my kid entering this world. The kind with lockers and buliten boards and hall passes. And tests. A world where from now on, he will be receiving a grade. Where he will be compared, judged, scolded, and ranked. We met his teacher the other night. Turns out I taught her son not too many years ago. Owen was off playing within seconds with a friend from his soccer team. Tearing the room apart. Ecstatic when he saw a big tub of legos. He will be just fine. But I wasn't so sure about me. I was suddenly filled with questions. The basic ones. Like how...